9/11 - Moriah dinner
This weather is remarkable. Hope a tree doesn't fall on me in the night. Cooked dinner of oatmeal. Finished off my peanut butter and the loaf of bread Belinda gave. Working on the remainder of the burgandy. Sweet person to give that away. The food bag is light -- some more oatmeal, gorp, snickers, two jellos, dried milk and the honey bear. Have some tea with which to go to sleep.
I am a little saddened that I can't share all of this adventure with mom and dad. If they knew the risks, knew what we do when we nighthike or stealth camp - or the ridgelines crossed in thunder and hail - then they would worry. And worry would be such a wasteful expenditure of energy. If some tragedy is to befall me, I won't likely know of its arrival until too much time has passed to avoid the situation. I would hope they know I am prepared for most potentials out here. I can gauge the terrain, and most of the time the weather. All I have to be wary of is my own bravado - and of others'. Beyond that, if nature is to take me, then she'll do so only after I have exhausted my alternatives. My own foolishness or misstep will be the only other source of harm - or finality. I hope I have the sense by now to forestall it. As the storm's winds intensify beyond my plastic home, a few pages of Thoreau, then sleep beckons.
'I wish I could fall in love
Though it only leads to trouble, oh I know it does
Still I'd fool myself and gladly, just to feel I was
In love, in love
I wish I could feel my heartbeat rise
And gaze into some gentle, warm excited eyes
And give myself as truly as an arrow flies
In windless skies
Oh I remember you in the tv light
Holding you close to me where we lay
And now I wish I knew some of those softer nights
Whispering quietly, feeling you turn to me
Only last night in the winter dark
I dreamed of how you loved, in all your innocence
And I've never known a softer warmer feeling since, or a truer heart
Maybe these dreams are leading me
Maybe love is not as gentle as my memory
Maybe time and wishful half-remembered fantasy are the greatest part'
-c. wheeler, Arrow